Are You Running on Empty? 9 Signs of Mom Burnout
First and foremost, if you're experiencing any or all of the following symptoms and notice signs of depression, it's crucial to consult your doctor and establish a strong support system. Seeking help as soon as you feel off can make a significant difference in your recovery and understanding that you're not alone in your struggles. Don't hesitate to reach out for professional guidance and support - it's a brave and important step towards healing and finding your way forward.
Burnout is like the ultimate mom tax - you know, that exhaustion that comes from trying to be a referee, chef, chauffeur, and therapist all at once (and don't even get me started on the laundry). It's the chronic stress of parenting, working, and keeping everyone's schedules straight (while trying to remember your own name). Some signs of burnout are obvious, like when you start to feel like parenting has become a chore or snapping over everything. And let's be real, feeling tired all the time is just the new normal. But if you're experiencing a combo of these symptoms, it might be time to sound the burnout alarm: no joy in parenting, constant fatigue, irritability, and a strong desire to hide in the pantry with a box of cookies (no judgment). Below are 9 common signs of mom burnout.
1. Extreme Fatigue (even after a full night’s sleep)
Ah, sleep - the elusive dream (literally!) for moms. While it's normal to be tired as a parent, burnout and stress can lead to a debilitating exhaustion that goes beyond just being tired. Even with adequate sleep, you may find yourself feeling drained during the day, with a fatigue that affects your cognitive, emotional, and physical state. And let's be real, not even the largest cup of coffee can save you from this exhaustion!
2. Mom Rage
Let's face it, kids can push our buttons - especially in the morning when they're wearing mismatched shoes and refusing to put on a coat when it's freezing outside! But if you're finding yourself yelling at the smallest things, like a spilled bag of chips, or having to remind yourself not to lose your cool, you might be dealing with some good ol' mom rage. I mean, who hasn't been there, right? The lack of sleep, the constant testing of patience, the partner who sleeps through it all... it's enough to drive a mom crazy! But if your anger is taking over, it's time to take a step back and recognize it might be more than just mom-life stress.
3. Feeling emotionally depleted
Mom burnout - or as I like to call it, 'Survival Mode' also has a fancy name: Depleted Mother Syndrome. And let's be real, who hasn't felt emotionally depleted when they're running on coffee fumes, sleepless nights, and a never-ending to-do list? It's like, hello, I'm a human being, not a superhero! So yeah, one of the biggest signs of mom burnout is feeling like you're running on empty - physically, emotionally, and mentally. Like you have no energy left to give. And if you're feeling like you're just going through the motions, or worse, wondering if you're even a real person anymore (depersonalization, anyone?), it's time to take a step back and refill that cup, mama!
4. Decreased Productivity
When the thought of getting out of bed for a cup of coffee feels like climbing Mount Everest, you know you're in trouble. And not to mention the laundry and cleaning - it's like, can't the dust bunnies just vacuum themselves up?! And worse, when playing with your mini-me's starts to feel like a chore, instead of a fun bonding experience, it's time to take a step back! I mean, who doesn't love a good game of "Mom, can you make the action figure fly?" or "Let's have a tea party with the baby dolls!"? But when it starts to feel like a burden, it's time to take a deep breath, put on your comfiest PJs, and remember - it's okay to not be okay, mama!
5. Limited Patience
Patience? What patience?! When you're dealing with a tiny human who's having a meltdown because they can't find the blue marker, it's hard not to lose your cool. This where that saying, “choose your battles” comes to play. But if you find yourself snapping at every little thing, like when your kiddo asks you for the millionth time why the sky is blue (um, because it just is, okay?!), or when they request a cup of water the second you sit down, it might be more than just a case of the usual grumpies. And let's not forget the lovely side effects of stress: headaches, brain fog, and a severe case of "I can't even..." No mom needs that kind of drama in her life! Pass the wine (or coffee... or chocolate...), and someone please find me that blue marker!
6. Not Enjoying Activities
Another sign you may be burnt out is if you start feeling like a zombie mom - going through the motions, but not really being present or enjoying activities, even with your tiny humans (who, let's be real, are usually the highlight of our day!). You might find yourself nodding off during storytime. The pleasures you used to enjoy, like reading or crafting or exercising become hard to do, even when you loved doing those things before. If you're feeling numb, disconnected, or just plain exhausted, it's time to take a step back, and prioritize your own self-care.
7. Increase in Unhealthy Habits
When you're burnt out, it's like your self-care compass breaks, and you start navigating towards Crapville (population: you, and your stash of hidden cookies). You might find yourself:
Sneaking treats after bedtime (those cookies won't eat themselves)
Picking up old vices like smoking or worse, starting new ones.
Forgetting water exists (hello, dehydration headaches!)
Staying up way too late scrolling through TikTok (hypocrite alert - I know, I give my teenager a hard time for doing the same thing!)
Binge-watching an entire season of your favorite show in one sitting (no judgment, we've all been there)
Eating an entire pizza by yourself.
And, let's be real, maybe even overindulging in that glass of wine (one glass with dinner becomes one glass while cooking, one with dinner, and one (or two) after dinner...).
Burnout loves to sneak in and sabotage our healthy habits, but that’s when you know it's time to take back control and prioritize our well-being! Which leads to the next sign…
8. Lack of Self Care
Like above, burnout has a sneaky way of sabotaging our self-care routines as well, making us forget (or just plain not care) about the little things that keep us feeling human. You might find yourself:
Forgetting to brush your teeth (morning and night)
Skipping showers (dry shampoo is a mom's best friend, right?)
Ditching exercise.
Eating like a college student.
Not taking any time for yourself to just be.
That reading you used to love so much becomes a thing of the past.
And let's not forget the classic: drinking an entire pot of coffee in one day (because sleep is optional, right?)
It's like our self-care compass breaks, and we lose our way. But here's the thing: taking care of ourselves is not selfish, it's essential. So, let's make a conscious effort to prioritize our own well-being, shall we? Check out “No Excuses! 5-Minute Self-Care for Busy Moms” or “Mommy Makeover: 5 Self-Care Habits to Transform Your Life” for some great and easy ways to practice self care for any mom.
9. Not Finding the Joy in Parenting
Let's face it, mom burnout can make you feel like you're stuck in a never-ending cycle of tantrums, messy rooms, and constant questions of "Mom, can I have a snack?" But when you start to lose interest in playing with your tiny humans or find yourself snapping at them for no reason (other than the fact that they exist), it's time to take notice. And then of course, mom guilt will inevitably follow, because let's be real, our kids are adorable and innocent (mostly).
But here's the thing: mom burnout is not a sign of failure, it's a sign that you need a break (and a nap, and a coffee...). So, don't be afraid to reach out to your doctor, therapist, or a trusted loved one for support. With a little self-love and self-care, you can get your joy back and remember why you became a mom in the first place (hint: it's not just for the free hugs).